Jeff's Darn wx Blog » Humor

Maybe I shoulda skipped that last burrito

Jeff A — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 04:46:01 +0000

I think this may be how you define irony!

Jeff A — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 21:41:20 +0000

Or at the very least it’s a placement fail!

Click to embiggen

Cowboy Bob.

Jeff A — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 23:35:35 +0000

With a creepy looking skull looking over his shoulder.

I thought you was…

Jeff A — Fri, 05 Aug 2011 21:21:03 +0000

Circus midgets!

Let me expand on that a bit!

Jeff A — Wed, 01 Jun 2011 18:54:07 +0000

I mentioned on Facebook on Memorial day that I was at the pool. I mentioned that it was very hot. I mentioned that I can’t swim. I also brought up the fact that I am supposed to avoid direct sunlight for long periods.

Let’s expand on these just a bit!
1) It was HOT! I do not like HOT. I prefer lukewarm.

2) I cannot swim, at all. I actually had a swim instructor tell me I cannot swim, I believe him!

3) Some of my meds make me extra sensitive to sunlight so I try to stay in the shade when I am outside. That is not so easy at the pool as they seem to not have figured on any more than one person ever wanting to be in the shade.

Now, on to some other observations:
4) The first thing I saw when I got there was a rather (more than)Rubenesque woman stretching the boundaries of a two piece bikini. I know I am supposed to be nice all the time but really, there are some things you really don’t want to see and wish you could un-see when you happen upon it.

5) I am pleased to announce that the beer belly is back in fashion among middle aged men. While my belly may not be from beer, it did make me feel better about not being the only one there. I kept my shirt on, guys take note, it ain’t sexy.

6) Our community pool hosts the largest gathering of rednecks this side of a NASCAR race!

7) I am amazed at the amount of people who pay no attention to what their kids are doing in public. Add in a large swimming pool and this becomes even more perplexing to me.

8 ) Guys, have your wives do a little something about that tuft of hair coming out of the top of your shorts in back. I DO NOT want to see your butt hair, nobody else does either.

k, I’m done now.

We’re DOOMED!

Jeff A — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 03:46:51 +0000

I would say that this is a big FAIL.

Click to enlarge

In case you can’t tell, the map is missing. I am really enjoying my new phone. Trying to work with it’s cameras limitations is challenging and entertaining.

Zombie Plant?

Jeff A — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 01:33:54 +0000

This is the most amazing African Violet ever! It has sat on the kitchen windowsill for over 3 years, that in and of itself is amazing considering neither Becky nor I can keep even an air fern alive. This thing just keeps going and going. There have been periods where we forgot to water it and it would be pretty much dried up, I would water it and in a few days it would be good as new. Seriously, I am now scared of it!

Click to enlarge

As long as it never says feed me Seymour.

This may be a new record!

Jeff A — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 16:43:25 +0000

I think I have all my Christmas shopping done now. I never finish this early, ever.

The judge sided with me in my attempt to receive medicaid due to my disability. Now on to more pressing matters like finding someone who can actually help me feel better.

The girls are out for Christmas break until the 5th of January. Please please pray for me, I think I’m going to need it.

I apologize to all my blog friends, I have been neglecting you all for too long. I have a lot of catching up to do, hold on tight while I try to read everything that I have missed over the last few weeks.

Dismissed!

Google rules!

Jeff A — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 02:17:30 +0000

Have I mentioned my love of the Pearls before Swine comic before? No, probably not, they at times can cross the line. But sometimes one is just too hilarious to pass up, this is one of those!

Click to go to comics.com site

I almost cringe at this!

Jeff A — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 03:40:42 +0000

Aside from the fact that the wedding was for my step son, there was one other unique attribute. The brides family has a rather, shall we say, unique sense of humor:

Click to enlarge

Yes, that is indeed a shotgun he is holding!

This is why I will never do another family wedding shoot, a little too much pressure.