I mentioned on Facebook on Memorial day that I was at the pool. I mentioned that it was very hot. I mentioned that I can’t swim. I also brought up the fact that I am supposed to avoid direct sunlight for long periods.

Let’s expand on these just a bit!
1) It was HOT! I do not like HOT. I prefer lukewarm.

2) I cannot swim, at all. I actually had a swim instructor tell me I cannot swim, I believe him!

3) Some of my meds make me extra sensitive to sunlight so I try to stay in the shade when I am outside. That is not so easy at the pool as they seem to not have figured on any more than one person ever wanting to be in the shade.

Now, on to some other observations:
4) The first thing I saw when I got there was a rather (more than)Rubenesque woman stretching the boundaries of a two piece bikini. I know I am supposed to be nice all the time but really, there are some things you really don’t want to see and wish you could un-see when you happen upon it.

5) I am pleased to announce that the beer belly is back in fashion among middle aged men. While my belly may not be from beer, it did make me feel better about not being the only one there. I kept my shirt on, guys take note, it ain’t sexy.

6) Our community pool hosts the largest gathering of rednecks this side of a NASCAR race!

7) I am amazed at the amount of people who pay no attention to what their kids are doing in public. Add in a large swimming pool and this becomes even more perplexing to me.

8 ) Guys, have your wives do a little something about that tuft of hair coming out of the top of your shorts in back. I DO NOT want to see your butt hair, nobody else does either.

k, I’m done now.

Yeah I still have stuff to talk about on the trip.

I like to kid people sometimes. Not relentlessly or anything like that but mild teasing! My wife has a few things that she does that bring this out in me. One of them is when she says wash, she pronounces it warsh. Don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of friends from southern states so she isn’t the first one to take the brunt of my attack on this one.

Anyway, we stopped on the upper tip of Arkansas at a restaurant called the Apple Barrel. I figured with a name like that it couldn’t be too bad! I was wrong. Anyway, we get in there and order our drinks and the waitress goes away for awhile. She finally comes back but she is empty handed. She explains to us that it has been busy and all the glasses are dirty, “As soon as we get some warshed, I’ll get your drinks”. I looked at my wife and burst into laughter, I then commented that she was in her element here. She actually laughed too, thank God.

We also stopped at a gas station just before we got into Arkansas that caught my attention. Not so much that it was in the middle of nowhere technically speaking, not even that fact that they didn’t have card readers on the pumps. It was a little mom and pop outfit so I forgave that. What really got my attention was the sign on the door that said, among other things:

If you don’t have shoes
If you don’t have a shirt
If you have to pull up your pants in order to walk
go back to your car and get dressed!

For some reason that made me laugh for quite awhile. Yeah the guy working there was a bit of a redneck, but at least he had his priorities straight.

We also stopped at a convenience store and a man approached us as we were leaving and asked me if I was a Pastor. I said no and what made him think that. He pointed at the cross around my neck. Apparently no one in Arkansas wears a cross? Well except for their pastors.

Alright, thats it for now.
God bless